From the notebooks of faith

Rabbi Avraham Shalom.
I read the rabbi’s article on “those who come out with the question.” I feel great identification with what is said. I personally struggle with these issues and am now reading the books of faith that the rabbi wrote. In all the settings in which I studied (high school yeshiva, seder, etc.), these issues were accepted as self-evident axioms, and settings that deal with these issues as preparatory classes are considered less so.
I would like to ask precisely about this phenomenon, as it were, about God’s “will” for the believing person at this time.
I apologize in advance that my writing will not be characterized by logical, philosophical, and reasonable precision, and that there may be errors in the presentation resulting from incomplete definitions, but I have no doubt that the Rabbi will nevertheless be able to direct me to the real points in the issues raised.
According to what is described in the tradition, one gets the impression that at least the generation of the desert had a revelation that was certain for them, at least on the sensory level required for a human being to establish his faith. (Although there is no absolute certainty in anything, as the rabbi wrote in his introduction to the books). Although it can be said according to Maimonides, prophecy is not a revelation either, but rather a sharpening of the prophet’s senses to “receive” the constant message.
The Ramban’s words are well known, why the revelation in a more tangible way was a one-time thing. In any case, in my opinion, if I look at most other “realities” that are not tangible, it seems that the ability to be convinced of them seems more reasonable. For example, the theory of energy transfer. Although the transfer of energy without a medium by an electromagnetic wave may be puzzling and despite all the history of the reincarnations of the “ether”. It seems that most people can with a high probability accept the theory, at least for now in their old age. This acceptance is even if they are not familiar with the details of the theory (Maxwell’s equation) and even if they are not convinced of its logic and even if they have faith in the explanation and even if they are aware that another, better explanation may exist in the future.
A less “scientific” and more paradoxical example is the rabbi’s book “Sciences of Freedom”, the body-mind problem and the psycho-physical problem, although most people cannot explain logically, “scientifically” why they are not robots. It is clear to the vast majority that they have free choice that does not stem solely from the initial conditions of the system or from environmental structures. People live with this contradiction and it is very significant in their lives, even if they do not believe in G-d.
The divine reality cannot be compared to the “wisdom of reasoning,” and of course it is only a parable. But when I stand and seek to establish my faith, I encounter difficulty. I know the popular formulation of the main “leads” to faith. 1. Observation of nature and the ideas behind it (“the distinct intellects”). 2. Tradition and the revelation of the giving of the Torah (“the Khozari”), 3. Observation of the history of the Jewish people, 4. Observation of the personal existential aspect inward – such as the rabbi’s book “Sciences of Freedom,” and as mentioned, I am currently reading the books of faith that the rabbi wrote. The rabbi formulates this in a more philosophical way: “The ontological, cosmological, and physico-theological argument, …. the “theological” formulation of the physico-theological argument, and the evidence from morality.”
Still, out of a sincere desire to be faithful to the Torah and the commandments and to the “will” of God in the world. I encounter great difficulty because God “hides” from those who seek Him. The statement that we are in a period of “concealing faces” could have been an answer to him. It would also make sense to me and would not create a sense of “apologetic” babbling that you cannot argue much about (of course, I don’t think it can be refuted).
Is it God’s “will” to cause the believer in our day, doubts, confusion, to the point of a high probability of abandoning the path of the Torah? This is a probability that did indeed occur during the era of secularization and enlightenment. Today, after all the old factors of “Torah and science” have been “resolved,” it has recently resurfaced in other directions.
Perhaps most of humanity believes in deism, which is very obvious in my opinion and blunts the need for an answer to this question, because it also does not require action. But regarding theism (the last author) and especially belief in the Torah from heaven, even if there are ways that lead to it, and indeed that is where I want to be and feel comfortable, I still feel that the sources I know require self-suggestion from me. Maybe it is not obvious? Do all the other people, the superior ones of humanity, those without foreign appeals, not see this?
I know of 3 main answers: 1. Indeed, a clear experience for believers, if faith were necessary it would take away freedom of choice (and for the “desert generation”? If there were other experiences). 2. This is the reality, as we do not ask, why the physical formulas were not revealed to us. 3. A. D. hides from the world, to allow it to “mature” and “exist.” B. This is a necessary “Hegelian” stage, in the spirit of Rabbi Kook, “for the good” of the faith and the world, despite the destructions therein (still poses a huge challenge to believers).
These answers do not satisfy me. The main reason is that we base all the wealth of Jewish wealth (Torah, Gemara, etc.) on a fundamental point. That we believe is only “sufficiently reasonable.” As mentioned, even in the scientific parable, we base ourselves on axioms that are not understood, are not certain, and are not closed (like “Gedel”, or like the Dirac function that engineers continued to use for decades before mathematicians were able to formalize it). However, the inner feeling at least is that they are reasonable enough to build airplanes from them and “force” others to live with their effects.
Shouldn’t our demand, at least towards non-religious Jews to follow the path of the Torah (and also towards the world), be based on something very reasonable, which at least the best of them would also be able to accept. And not just on something that may be obvious, but cannot be contradicted by definition? (That is, faith is not something “irrational” or something “rational” but irrational). (I am ignoring for now, the very acceptable assumption to me that providence has turned so that there will be no ability to “demand” at the moment, until the generation is qualified for it). In general, if it is not possible in this age to “convince” anyone, how can one demand?
There is a secondary reason that makes it difficult for me. We believe that prophecy is destined to return. The feeling is that the idea of ​​a prophet in our day seems implausible in the analytical tools and in the way we perceive reality (and not only because the generation has not yet been trained and the spiritual reality has not yet matured).
It is clear to me that there is no “crushing” argument and there is no absolute certainty in such matters, nor am I seeking one, as the Rabbi writes: “Even in the case where each individual consideration is perceived by someone as relatively weak, the totality of the considerations can still gain strength beyond the simple sum of the strengths of the individual arguments. … It is also important to note that my goal here is not to reach certainty, but to present reasonable arguments of common sense. For me, the test is whether the arguments I have raised hold water, that is, are acceptable, and not whether they are certain or necessary. They are not.”
Do most of the reasonable, excellent people in humanity accept this set of arguments for the reality of G-d and the Torah from heaven, even if only based on “combining the considerations into a comprehensive picture”? My main feeling is that this is not self-evident, and therefore the question becomes even stronger whether this is the bedrock of our existence, the foundation on which the entire tower is built. Is this indeed reasonable, and if so, why is this so (if it is even permissible to ask), what are the implications?
 
This fundamental question has been bothering me for a long time and, unfortunately, prevents me from easily opening up to additional options for increasing my personal sense of divine reality. I would be very happy to hear the Rabbi’s opinion.
Thank you very much,