Grandpa with a short fuse
The grandfather with a sharp tongue and a short fuse.
A little bit of currency in his hand
And a little because of age, I am sick and in constant pain.
Now his granddaughter is supposed to get married, but the bride doesn’t want him to come at all.
The parents are debating whether to honor him and hurt the bride, or honor the bride and hurt him.
The bride cannot be convinced.
What to do?
The event is meant to make the bride happy, so I think it’s better not to invite him. Maybe you can talk to him and present the problem to him, and he’ll understand on his own that he needs to appease her and try to change his ways. Then maybe she’ll compromise too.
He is a type locked in strange ‘thinking’ patterns
and doesn't think much.
In a beast there is
so there is no one to talk to…,
In the Mitzvah of Shvat
The problem is complicated, on the one hand the grandfather may be a ‘scoundrel’, but on the other hand the commandment to honor parents and grandparents and their teachers, was also said about a ‘scoundrel parent’ who takes off his shoe and beats his son in front of many, so that the son-in-law's daughter and her parents cannot help but invite him. This is what there is and we must deal with it, and the suffering in honoring the parent comes with the reward of the mitzvah.
What the son-in-law can do is:
A. After all, we know the grandfather's sensitivities, and if we know what his ‘craziness’ is, we can prepare in advance to fulfill his duty. After all, the bride will have a wonderful exercise in the ’bride’, ‘side’ path’ to a good relationship, which is all about being able to accommodate others.
B. The path of a bride in her wedding is such that in ’real time’ she will not notice at all the existence of the grandfather and what he says or does, and he will also be in an elevated mood when he sees his granddaughter under the canopy, and a good mood increases the chance that he will be nice.
With wishes of Mazal Tov to the three generations, Fish”l
The comparison to a scolding parent is incorrect. If he comes and scolds me, I should refrain. But I don't have to invite him knowing that he will scold me.
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