How do you live with feelings of guilt?
Someone who was my teacher, who believed in me becoming a doctor when no one else did, passed away today from a long illness, and because of the profession I chose, I haven’t visited her since I started working there, which is about 7 months ago, because I haven’t been to the city where she lives and because of the daily rush.
How do I live with feelings of guilt? Am I selfish? A bad person? Because I couldn’t find time to visit her after she stood by my side in my difficult moments? Are there sources I can read and find comfort in?
Hello. It’s hard to give a definitive answer here. It would have been appropriate to criticize her, but still what you did falls within the bounds of a reasonable person. We are all immersed in everyday life, even if we call it selfishness, it is selfishness at the level of a reasonable person. Therefore, you should not have any qualms of conscience.
I think that if you leverage your guilt feelings towards being more careful in your later life about treating others, and especially visiting the sick and elderly, it will definitely make up for it. I assume your teacher will be much happier with that, much more than if you walk around with guilt feelings that are of no use to anyone. If you are a doctor, as I understand from your words, then you certainly have many opportunities to treat your patients, especially the elderly. This is the best way to compensate and atone for what you are feeling now.
This is my answer on the essential level. As for the psychological question (how to live with this or that emotion), I have no knowledge and I am not the addressee for that.
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