Voices in female conversion
Hello Rabbi,
A woman whose grandfather was Jewish is undergoing a conversion process in an Orthodox community abroad.
She is in a relationship with a Jew and they are having a marital relationship, with the intention of marrying as a Jew after conversion.
Due to the ongoing conversion process, the Jew is still a sinner.
Is it possible for her to convert privately now (before the conversion in the community, but not in its place) so that after that she can become the wife/concubine of the Jew, in order to reduce his sins? If so, what are the minimum conditions for conversion from her perspective (acceptance of the commandments, baptism) and from the perspective of the private people (who are not dayanim) who will accept her conversion?
It seems to me that it is best to inform the court of the situation and let them decide. That is exactly their mandate. Private individuals are not supposed to convert. They are not subject to the law of mission that allows conversion.
Beyond that, I am personally against conversions of spouses (and it doesn’t matter if the grandfather is Jewish) and also generally against halachic acts that aim to reduce prohibitions. If they break a prohibition, let them break it. No one needs to convert to reduce someone else’s prohibitions.
If you were a judge, would you demand that the woman stop living with the man?
(Apparently, on her part, "There is no blind man before me, you shall not hinder me," since she is still a Gentile)
And does the fact that you are personally against the conversion of wives mean that you would not cooperate if you were sitting in a court of law or serving as a judge?
I wouldn't demand anything. I just wouldn't convert her because she doesn't really want to convert.
If I were convinced that her desire was true (including accepting the mitzvot), then I would demand that she stop living with him until after conversion and marriage as a Jew.
I think so (I wouldn't cooperate).
But apparently she doesn't commit any sin when she lives with him while still a Gentile?
It certainly passes. First, even among the sons of Noah there are family values. Beyond that, the convert must observe the commandments and certainly show seriousness and intention to observe them. And third, it is certainly not appropriate to do so even if there is no formal prohibition.
Beyond that, I thought that it is reasonable to say that there is a blind person in front of a Gentile who stumbles a Jew, just as there is a blind person in front of a Jew who stumbles a Gentile (see 7:15). And as mentioned, it is certainly not appropriate for him to do so.
Indeed, from the issue of 7:14 there we see that there is no prohibition against a blind person. If a Gentile were forbidden against a blind person, then his stumbling would be against a regular stumbling block and not against a stumbling block. It must be rejected.
[I am reminded of the dictum of Rabbi Meslan that whoever stumbles his fellow transgresses infinitely to the enmity of a blind person. I stumble him with the prohibition itself. He stumbles me with a stumbling block. I fail him with my failure and God forbid.]
See here:
http://www.dirshu.co.il/%D7%9E%D7%9B%D7%99%D7%A8%D7%AA-%D7%9E%D7%90%D7%9B%D7%9C%D7%95%D7%AA-%D7%90%D7%A1%D7%95%D7%A8%D7%95%D7%AA-%D7%9C%D7%92%D7%95%D7%99-%D7%A9%D7%99%D7%90%D7%9B%D7%99%D7%9C-%D7%9E%D7%95%D7%9E%D7%A8%D7%AA/
It seems that the entire discussion is only on the side of the responsibility of the first Jew for the offense of the last Jew. There is no concern about the Gentile stumbling the Jew, and succeeding in doing so.
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