Q&A: Confusion Between a Rabbi and His Community
Confusion Between a Rabbi and His Community
Question
Hello Rabbi,
We currently live in a growing community with several dozen residents. The character of the settlement is very Torah-oriented, and in recent years the communal conversation has revolved around the “problem of the settlement rabbi.” A situation has developed in which the settlement rabbi is a veteran of this community, and most of the residents came after him. But a situation has arisen in which the rabbi wants the people of the community to accept his authority in every communal detail, such as: which male or female youth counselor will be at the local branch, who will be accepted to any committee, he asks to approve every cultural activity in the settlement, and it even reached the point of a ruling in which he said that teenage girls should stay home every Friday night and not walk around outside.
The reality today is that most of the settlement knows that his behavior is inappropriate and incorrect. The girls of the settlement also do walk around on Friday nights, but with a sense of discomfort in light of the settlement rabbi’s ruling. Many times the rabbi stirs up quarrels and conflict among people, and claims about anyone who does not submit to his authority that he is not suitable for the settlement. And despite all this, most of us do not know how to conduct ourselves in the face of this awkward situation.
It is needless to say that this is a Torah-oriented Religious Zionist community, not Hasidic, not some kind of sect (at least from the residents’ perspective).
Our question is: since this is not a matter of criminal behavior similar to what the Takana Forum deals with, we are in a gray area, where we do not know whether the right thing is to tell him outright that his leadership is not relevant. (It should be noted that this has already been hinted to him several times, but he has no interest in letting go.) We are concerned about the honor due to a Torah scholar, or concerned about creating chaos in the settlement (vis-à-vis the rabbi and a number of families who are devoted to following his discipline).
How do you think we should act toward him and in order to resolve this awkward situation?
Do you have articles we could read, or sources that could help us understand the halakhic issue on this topic? It would help people to know that such a step—making an unequivocal statement to him—is halakhically supported as a proper and correct step.
Thank you very much
Answer
Hello.
If what you are describing reflects the feeling of most of the residents, then the conclusion is that the rabbi is not suitable for the settlement. It is definitely right and important to say this out loud, and it should not harm his honor. You are not saying that he is not a Torah scholar, and you also do not need to say that he is behaving improperly. You are only saying that his policy is not suitable for you. After all, there are rabbis who rule and think differently, meaning that your position is not outside the halakhic spectrum. Moreover, a person is not supposed to pay personal prices in order not to hurt someone else’s honor, certainly when the blame is not his alone but also lies with the other party. Therefore it is clear that there is no reason at all to hint anything to anyone. Nor do you need to tell him that his behavior is in a gray area, because it is not. From what you described, it is completely in the white area—it is just not suitable for you. You need to gather and choose another rabbi for the settlement. That is all.
There is no question here of halakhic backing for such a step. A person or a settlement is supposed to choose a rabbi for itself, not accept a rabbi it does not want. “Make for yourself a rabbi” was said to the person, not to the rabbi—that he should make himself into a rabbi over others. Of course, his honor should be preserved and this should not be turned into a personal quarrel. The claims should be substantive, and if a majority forms, you should act accordingly.
Beyond that, a rabbi has no authority to determine what people do in their own time and place. If a girl wants to go outside in the evening, there is no reason in the world that she should refrain from doing so because of a “ruling” by the settlement rabbi. Both because he is not necessarily her rabbi, but rather the rabbi of the settlement, and because this is not a halakhic ruling, since that question is not halakhic. It is a question of policy or guidance, and there is no obligation whatsoever to accept the policies of the settlement rabbi. Certainly not if this was not explicitly stipulated with him in advance (but even if it was). Would you also not listen to music that the rabbi says is improper to hear? Or not play basketball if he says it is improper to do so?