Q&A: Birth Control
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This is an English translation (via GPT-5.4). Read the original Hebrew version.
Birth Control
Question
Hello Rabbi,
With God's help, I am getting married soon. My fiancée is 30 and wants not to have children in the first year so that we can invest the time in strengthening the marital relationship. She is afraid to take birth-control pills. Do you know of other solutions for birth control that are permitted according to Jewish law?
Thank you
Answer
You can find overviews online. Every method has its advantages and disadvantages, and everything depends on how necessary it is.
Discussion on Answer
If you do not have relations at the time of ovulation, then the chance of becoming pregnant is small. It is better to leave an additional safety margin. If for some reason there is no alternative, then a condom is also possible.
A continuation of the question:
After checking with the bridal instructor and the gynecologist, it was agreed that the options are an intrauterine device or pills. Both solutions cause her anxiety, and she is unwilling to use them because of a very strong fear. She has come to the conclusion that on days when there is a chance of conception, we will not fulfill the conjugal obligation in order to prevent an unplanned pregnancy. My wife is in psychological treatment and takes anti-anxiety medication, and it is quite clear that it would not be good to drop a pregnancy on her, which could destabilize her mental state (in the past she had mental crises due to stress). But she is still very anxious and deeply distressed by all this. Is it possible to permit the use of a condom for birth control in this case?
Thank you for the help