Q&A: A Charm for Finding a Match
A Charm for Finding a Match
Question
With God's help,
To Rabbi Michael Abraham, may he live long and well,
I wanted to ask the Rabbi on behalf of a woman who is delayed in finding a match and wants to merit a proper match: what charm or auspicious practice can the Rabbi suggest for her?
She has done many such practices and nothing helps: the seven meals with "Who brings forth bread" at the final meal before the fast, the 18 candles for Rabbi Matya, seven circles in Amuka, and more and more.
Today she is kind of formerly religious, because all the charms she pinned her hopes on turned out not to help her, and she thinks these are nonsense.
Can the Rabbi suggest some charm, and through that merit she will be able to return to repentance?
Answer
Certainly. First of all, she is not formerly religious now. Before this, when she believed in all those pieces of nonsense, she was the one who was formerly religious—or at least stumbling in accessories of idolatry. Now she has gone back to being rational. All that remains is for her to understand that these absurdities should not be linked to faith or to halakhic commitment, and therefore when they do not work, that says absolutely nothing about faith in God and commitment to His commandments.
Discussion on Answer
Honorable Rabbi,
I passed the answer on to the young woman whose match is delayed,
She claims that this only makes her more antagonistic, because you speak about others with contempt and in a contemptuous way.
Therefore she assumes that, judging by your style of speaking, the Rabbi is actually deviant or a pedophile. 🤷♂️
(I have the original WhatsApp recording.)
What is strange is that today she is about three-quarters secular and very rational. But she grew up in a Haredi home and in good seminaries. After that she completed a bachelor's degree in computer science, and so on.
How does the Rabbi explain the dissonance?
A reference to the joke: "The God I don't believe in is a good and upright God, not evil and wicked like the one you don't believe in."
Let's say gently that her response does not fit your description of her.
If the charms have run out, it might be worth trying pink ones.