Q&A: Matchmaking
Matchmaking
Question
Hello, honored Rabbi,
I wanted to know what the Rabbi’s view is regarding matchmaking. What does it mean that from Heaven a woman is designated for a man? Does that mean there is no choice at all—that one should not take active steps to find a wife—or is there choice, and it depends only on me? I also wanted to ask, as a continuation of the first question, whether trying to revive a match that fell through goes against the idea of personal effort—meaning, is that too much—or does it depend on me and what I feel?
Thank you very much.
Answer
There is a letter from Maimonides saying that this Talmudic passage should be disregarded, since this is a matter of performing a commandment. That is what I, in my humble opinion, think as well. One should conduct oneself according to common sense and ignore theology.