Q&A: Questions and Doubts
Questions and Doubts
Question
Hello Rabbi,
I asked you a question in the past… and you suggested that we meet and talk, which in the end didn't happen…
In any case, the issue is still bothering me, and I’d be glad to hear the Rabbi’s opinion.
I’m a young woman from a Haredi home, and I keep most of the commandments.
For about two years now I’ve had questions, doubts, and hesitations about faith in God and the Jewish religion, the Hebrew Bible.
After a lot of thought, I came to the conclusion that truth is certain in some cases, and in others it is relative—or what is right for each person. After all, it’s impossible to prove that one particular worldview is better than another, because this is belief.
And since God and the Hebrew Bible cannot be definitively proven, I don’t think it’s worth wasting an entire life on something that isn’t certain.
I believe in things that I understand to be good, like choice, and love over hatred.
But I don’t understand how the story of the Hebrew Bible makes sense, and so it’s hard for me to believe in it. Questions have been coming up for me since the end of high school.
I don’t understand why so many people believe things blindly, based on emotion and on the fact that this is the environment they grew up in.
I don’t think I’m some great genius. And I’m sure the Rabbi is already very experienced and wise and will find logical errors and subtleties in what I’m saying that I didn’t notice… but the basic idea and my situation are probably understandable.
But I know that most human beings already start from a certain assumption and then try to justify it with all kinds of arguments and rationalizations. That’s why there are different beliefs and disagreements. And that is what I call relative truth, in personal matters that are not universal. Absolute truth is that one must not murder. Relative truth is how a person perceives the reality around him (as long as he doesn’t violate universal truth and doesn’t harm other people). Example: a particular dog bit a person and damaged his property; the dog belonged to a child. The injured party came to the father with complaints, and the question arises: who is at fault and should be punished—the dog, the child, or the father? You can place the blame on any one of the three, with convincing reasons…
At first I thought that in the end I would find definite, absolute answers that the Hebrew Bible and God are real. But I didn’t reach that, and I began to doubt. Most people rely on emotion, and those who say it is based on reason—it still isn’t certain.
Because, as I already said, if someone wants to prove something, he starts from an assumption and finds arguments and justifications for it. Just like in Germany during the Holocaust, they found justifications and relied on philosophies in order to “purify Germany,” so to speak.
Or it’s a matter of brainwashing… they brainwashed people in Germany with those arguments, and so they thought that was the truth…
Obviously, if you put someone in a monastery for his whole life, he’ll be sure of the faith they taught him there. But people on the outside will be able to see his “truth,” his mistake.
I don’t think that through intellectual philosophical arguments one can arrive at certain truth in such complicated matters of worldview.
Because it will always be possible to think of a smarter counterargument. And also, of course, the smarter and more experienced person will come out on top even if he is mistaken.
Absolute truth can be proven. You can prove that the table is in the room, and there’s nothing to argue about. Of course one can philosophize that it’s all a dream and so on. But if we philosophize about reality, we won’t be able to move forward, so we have to rely on it as existing, and likewise on things that are clear and agreed upon by everyone. But how could I prove to someone that my belief is absolutely true and his is completely wrong?
So, as I mentioned, I don’t understand and also haven’t reached conclusive proof. Therefore I think that even if the Torah is true and there is a God, how could He punish a person who searched and arrived at this conclusion—after all, she did everything in her power… and it just wasn’t within her grasp.
Still, I do see advantages in religious life over secular life, such as general morality and satisfaction. And I also know that if I’m mistaken and keep nothing, I’ll lose everything. So it’s better for me to keep a little, as long as it doesn’t threaten me or harm me. Also, my family is very Haredi, so it isn’t worthwhile for me to leave and remain alone. What will I even find out there? I don’t know secular people, and I don’t think I’ll find much in the way of values. And I’m not certain at all. I’m in doubt. So I prefer to live as a skeptic. I came to the conclusion that I need to go according to truth that is absolute, and according to things I understand and am comfortable with. After all, why should I burden my life on the basis of uncertain things?!
I’m pretty despairing, but I have a conscience…
I’ll add that I do believe in a God as I understand Him—one who provides an explanation for physical phenomena, and who sustains the existence of the world… but I doubt the God of the Hebrew Bible…
That’s who I am, a skeptic. Of course my family knows nothing about this, because what would they understand anyway… I’ll mention that I studied in Haredi institutions, I’ve met a few rabbis in my life, but I knew they wouldn’t understand me and so they wouldn’t be able to try to help. They would just tell me I’m wrong and bring all kinds of arguments, and I of course would find arguments on the other side… Therefore I don’t think Torah and science will solve the problem, because they are built on claims and starting points that can be refuted and opposed with counterarguments….
So I’m still religious: I keep the Sabbath, try to make blessings, pray only on special holidays, wear semi-"modest" clothes, and I’m on the fence. But the doubt is still eating away at me (a lot…), and I’ll probably get married one day, and I wonder to whom. If he’s religious, how will he understand my skepticism? And a secular man isn’t an option.
I hope this is understandable. I wrote pretty spontaneously, and not in the most organized way..
Thank you for your attention and understanding.
Answer
Ruth, hello.
I suggested that we meet, and I assume that was because it’s hard to do justice to questions like these in this medium. I repeat that offer. If these things are important to you, then you need to invest some effort in clarifying them.
Briefly, I would say this: there is neither any need nor any possibility of reaching certainty about anything. But your assumption that if something isn’t certain then it isn’t worth investing in is, in my opinion, incorrect. Science too is not certain, and I assume you don’t hesitate to get on a plane or travel in a car, or take medicine. We make decisions on the basis of considerations of probability, not certainty.
Discussion on Answer
And how do you know that investigations won’t eventually undermine fear of Heaven?
And if they won’t undermine it in any case, what value does investigation have?
I have no answer to that.
Just as a side note: if after so many years that have passed, and so many books that have been written, investigations still lead so easily to heresy, that means the educational method is shaky and that there isn’t really reverence there, only: “Their fear of Me has become a commandment of men, learned by rote.”
What about the possibility that there is no one and nothing to feel reverence toward? And that the problem is not the education but the worldview being offered? That too is a possibility that has to be taken into account. If there is investigation, there is a chance of losing fear of Heaven.
“If there is no wisdom, there is no fear; if there is no fear, there is no wisdom.”
What does that mean? What is the definition of wisdom? Why must it necessarily dwell together with fear? Have you never seen a wise person who denied the faith? Or at least read a book by such a person?
About that he says later:
“Anyone whose wisdom exceeds his deeds—to what is he comparable? To a tree whose branches are many and whose roots are few; and the wind comes and uproots it and turns it over on its face, as it is said: ‘And he shall be like a lonely shrub in the desert, and shall not see when good comes, but shall dwell in the parched places in the wilderness, in a salt land and not inhabited.’ But anyone whose deeds exceed his wisdom—to what is he comparable? To a tree whose branches are few and whose roots are many, so that even if all the winds in the world come and blow upon it, they cannot move it from its place, as it is said: ‘And he shall be like a tree planted by waters, that spreads out its roots by the stream, and shall not fear when heat comes, but its leaf shall be green; and in the year of drought it shall not worry, nor shall it cease from yielding fruit.’
And similarly:
Rabbi Hanina ben Dosa says: Anyone whose fear of sin precedes his wisdom, his wisdom endures. And anyone whose wisdom precedes his fear of sin, his wisdom does not endure. He used to say: Anyone whose deeds exceed his wisdom, his wisdom endures. And anyone whose wisdom exceeds his deeds, his wisdom does not endure.”
Anyone whose wisdom precedes his fear of sin—his wisdom endures.
If he has the wisdom of a worm, then yes, it endures.
But nobody counts him.
A worm has no wisdom. It also doesn’t express itself. So there’s nothing there to endure. Read slowly, so your head won’t hurt.
A worm has a few hundred neurons, so there is some kind of wisdom there, though it is beyond the understanding of viruses like corona, the size of a dot.
No wisdom at all. Instinct and nothing more. Wisdom means knowledge and understanding of it. כדאי learn what words mean before writing, so you won’t come out a complete fool again.
Last Decisor, don’t you think that in order to understand the world it’s better to look at it instead of opening books? And note well: the verses you bring do not command or make a value judgment; they testify about reality. If you’ve gotten onto the wagon of investigation, take into account that you may or might come to the conclusion that you need to change your life and your view of it.
That is aside from the fact that the investigation itself may bring you to deny the validity of the verses, assuming you decided to see them as decisive regarding reality.
Ruth,
for people like you, the proof from the possibility of belief was already established on the site.
The very fact that if you had proof that the Torah is true, then you would keep the commandments because God commanded them and not out of concern for the World to Come or something like that, means that presumably even now you already believe in a God who commanded. And insofar as you identify that norm, then by Occam’s razor one could say that perhaps the most plausible conclusion is that commandments also in fact exist, and if so, what remains for you to search for is which religion is the truest. Unless perhaps you specifically reduce that norm to gratitude, but I don’t think that’s the simple reading. As I recall, this is mentioned a bit in Column 294.
Likewise, the very fact that you assume objective values exist, such as the prohibition on murder, makes you a great believer, as you also noted from the side of morality and so on.
But insofar as you are here in the world and believe in a God who intervened in His creation and legislated morality, is it really so far-fetched to you that there would also be further commandments, and in any case from the perspective of a person seeking meaning? As at the beginning of the fifth booklet here.
David Ziegel. There are 2 ways to acquire wisdom.
“Who is wise? One who learns from every person” — learning from others, from books.
“There is no wise person like one with experience” — through deeds, doing experiments, and so on.
As for the justified concerns, I can only say that if the situation is that after everything that has been written people still cast off the yoke so easily, that means something is broken in the whole method. And it is not so clear whether living under a broken method is preferable to the risk involved in those concerns. Some will say yes, some will say no.
Casting doubt is a foundation of faith in Judaism.
The best-known example: our forefather Abraham, who cast doubt and denied all the idolatry of his time.
Less well known. They probably didn’t tell you the following: who was the greatest investigator and skeptic of all time?
Moses our teacher.
Starting from the fact that he sees the burning bush, which doesn’t fit with what he knows, and approaches to see what it is.
And afterward, he actually doubts that it is God Himself speaking to him, and even doubts his mission, until God has to give him signs and wonders. He was that skeptical.
Ordinary people—there are some for whom even the rustling of the wind is enough to make them believe that God is speaking to them.
In any case, in the end, if there is no fear of Heaven, investigations won’t help, and it’s better to be a blind believer.