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Q&A: On the bounds of public affection

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Originally published:
This is an English translation (via GPT-5.4). Read the original Hebrew version.

On the bounds of public affection

Question

How careful does one need to be about touching and the like in public—between a married couple married in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel?

The question is relevant for those who fly abroad a lot with their spouse, and the crowding on the plane is beyond anything imaginable. What is the line one has to be careful about, including when sleeping in the middle of the flight, etc.?

What is the definition in these matters?

Answer

Is this trolling? What exactly is the question here? “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love”…

Discussion on Answer

Zalman (2022-07-07)

I didn’t understand what the problem is with his question. He’s asking what the definition is of public affection, which the Rema brought in Even HaEzer, section 21, as forbidden?

Michi (2022-07-07)

The problem is that even the Rema, who brings that “some say,” isn’t talking about touching but about acts of affection. What does that have to do with sitting or sleeping next to her on a plane? Nonsense.

Anonymous (2023-01-08)

Is this really a prohibition? I have pictures of myself hugging my wife on WhatsApp… am I supposed to delete them?

Michi (2023-01-08)

No need. These are norms that change with the generations and the circumstances. Even there it is brought as “proper conduct,” meaning accepted social norms.

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