Q&A: A Story About Reviving the Dead in Our Time and a Question About the Halakhic Implications
A Story About Reviving the Dead in Our Time and a Question About the Halakhic Implications
Question
Some time ago my brother called me and, in a voice full of sorrow, told me that so-and-so (someone the two of us knew and respected) had passed away.
As proof, he sent me an article from the Behadrei Haredim website about his death and the times for paying a condolence visit.
He couldn’t come to offer condolences, but he urged me to go.
I drove to that city, entered the neighborhood, saw mourning notices at the entrance, and then suddenly saw one particular house with many notices.
I assumed that was where the mourners were, and I went up to offer condolences (I knew he lived on a different street, but maybe he had moved somewhere else in the neighborhood in the many decades since I’d last visited?) a0
I sat down to offer condolences (I was a bit surprised that I didn’t recognize the mourners…) and started telling extravagant stories in his praise (true ones), but the mourners shifted uncomfortably…
Little by little it became clear that I had apparently come to comfort someone else, and that there were two Reuven son of Yaakovs in that neighborhood…
And I didn’t know the deceased at all… I was talking about someone else…
The mourners started chuckling, and I, out of embarrassment at my stupidity, did a "and he fled"—I ran out. Outside I could hear the mourners cracking up over the golem who had been there a moment earlier…
Apparently because I was so traumatized by the prank my brother had pulled on me…
I refused to think logically, and for some reason I assumed that indeed there were two Reuven son of Yaakovs in that neighborhood and both had died…
After all…
I had seen an explicit article on Behadrei…
I went to the known and familiar address of that Reuven son of Yaakov to offer condolences…
Of course I became a laughingstock and an object of ridicule and mockery for coming to comfort a live, healthy man standing there at full height…
I went back to the car and called my brother, who to this day claims that he acted innocently and didn’t think that two Reuven son of Yaakovs lived there, and never had any scheme in mind, and that the reason he didn’t come with me to offer condolences was just that he was busy…
1. Does my brother need to apologize and pay the travel expenses?
2. Did I somehow nevertheless fulfill the commandment of comforting mourners, since in the end they were roaring with laughter over the idiot who had been with them a moment earlier?
Answer
Your brother says he acted innocently. Quite apart from whether we trust him, that is very plausible: if you see a familiar name in the same neighborhood, it’s very reasonable to think it’s the same person. In my opinion he doesn’t need to apologize (perhaps a little, because maybe he should have checked more carefully before telling you so emphatically), and certainly not to pay.
Did you fulfill the commandment of comforting mourners? Very doubtful. But you certainly had good intentions, and the Holy One, blessed be He, joins good intention to the deed. So what practical difference does it make whether you fulfilled a commandment or not?!
I’m willing to pay your travel expenses if you’ll sell me the commandment. If you want, leave a phone number and I’ll call you.