Q&A: Is there a commandment to carry out the words of the deceased even when it's embarrassing?
Is there a commandment to carry out the words of the deceased even when it's embarrassing?
Question
What if someone leaves instructions that are embarrassing.
For example, to write on his gravestone: Here lies … son of …
A man who all his life worked hard and succeeded in not being a sucker,
and so he hopes that in Heaven too he won’t come out a sucker.
And to add a winking smiley.
May his soul be bound in the bond of life.
The sons and grandsons are embarrassed by such a tombstone.
Do they have to carry it out?
(And then they’ll be the suckers?)
Answer
I don’t see what there is to be embarrassed about in such an inscription. That’s what he wanted, and it characterizes him, not them. But if someone is hurt by it, then of course he is not obligated to act in order to put up such an inscription. But of course, if someone does put it up, nobody has the right to object to it or interfere with it.