Q&A: The Intention in Prayer
The Intention in Prayer
Question
When we pray and ask Him for forgiveness and pardon, how are we supposed to take it— as something genuine or as a kind of act? I mean all sorts of expressions that imply that what we did wrong somehow disturbs Him,
and likewise all kinds of expressions in the prayer where the author goes overboard about how deeply he regrets it, is shaken by it, and cannot understand how he dared—whereas the average person praying (or really any person praying), if he is not deceiving himself, understands that he has absolutely nothing in common with those words. So how are we supposed to take that?
Answer
You are supposed to feel regret. If you do not, then you should work on yourself so that it does happen. The phrases that do not reflect your actual feelings are setting a goal. But in many cases you do not have to say them literally. Most of these things are non-obligatory additions.
Discussion on Answer
I do not know what it means to cause Him pain. You regret not doing the right thing. That’s all. What happened to the Holy One, blessed be He, because of this is mainly His concern.
I didn’t understand the second question.
The second question is whether a person is supposed to believe that every trial he was given is something he can overcome—for example, a homosexual and so on—and therefore he is also supposed to regret that he stumbled.
This is not a matter of believing something a priori, but of a factual assessment. If you could have overcome it, then you failed; and if not, then not. The assumption that one can withstand every trial is indeed common, but in my opinion it has no basis whatsoever.
So if I understand correctly, when a person felt that he could not overcome it, then he does not need to regret it; in such a case it would also be false to regret it.
But the question then is: according to the view you’re expressing, namely that in your opinion there are trials that cannot be withstood, does that mean the Creator acts unjustly?
Correct. It is not unjust for two reasons: 1. The Holy One, blessed be He, did not do this. These are the laws of nature. 2. This is not a transgression, and no claims are held against you, so what is the problem?
Thank you. It seems to me there was one part of my question that you didn’t answer: should the regret only be about not listening to Him, or also about having caused Him pain and so on, all sorts of such formulations?
One more thing I remembered: what is a person supposed to think if he feels that he simply cannot overcome it, like a homosexual and the like?